Celebrate!

Friends have planned a party to celebrate my year with me. Georgia and Cheri arrive from Cambridge and Amesbury. Cheri brings deep purple flowers in one of the Old Quaker bottles she has dug up on her property. They drop off their belongings since they'll stay at my place tonight, then they head over to Anne's to help out. I'll arrive by 6 or earlier--no need for a grand entrance. My pseudo discomfort in the limelight must move forward to appreciate those who surround me, soak up the caring. Anne is hosting, Georgia and Cheri are out on last minute errands, Char arrives, Barbara, others not far behind. A few are on vacation and can't come. I enjoy this warm feeling together with community I have been building but have felt so cut off from this year.

Everyone has brought pot-luck, of course, and because there was mention that I like an occasional Margarita, Cheri brings me one, part of the last minute need-to-gets. The OLP slideshow that Jen made for the graduates is playing on Anne's TV in the background as we gather with hugs and hellos. Food moves to plates, people mill and sit.

Suddenly a large box wrapped in newspaper and bows is in my lap. I open it and find a new sleeping bag from Anne, Georgia, and Cheri! I no longer have to borrow one from Beth! Some would say one only needs a bed of soft pine needles or moss.

There are more cards--with unexpected amounts of money from women in the room and from some who were away and couldn't come, so that I can buy a tent, or a used kayak. The generosity is overwhelming and I am shocked into tears. Char adds a book to her gift, meeting faith: An Inward Odyssey by faith adiele.

I reach for a reading of Gratitude that I have brought. It is a compilation from my blog and from my Independent Project. There are many who have supported me in specific ways over this last year and earlier and I have mentioned them by name. There are others who may not be named but are appreciated in my life just the same. I feel surrounded by caring and appreciation.

Then DJ Anne kicks on the tunes. We get home around 2 so  sleeping-in is in order for the morning. We head out to Shelburne Falls for Cheri's birthday brunch and show the city girls the Glacial Pot Holes.

In my thoughts about how to spend this money, I know a tent could give me the a sense of self sufficiency, survival. Hey, I could live in a tent for a while and work on those back-packing and camping skills. Then again, a kayak would allow me to hone my paddling skills which I'm afraid of losing if I don't have a way to paddle over the    Anne, Char, Cheri, Georgia, Me
summer. If I don't try to find a kayak now when I have this gift, I may not get one. It's interesting to witness the dilemma of suddenly having rather than not having.

Then the celebration is over. Or is it? Maybe I need to find ways to keep the joy and sense of accomplishment fresh. That could help me as I navigate the "what's next?" phase of this path in my life. I have had small bouts of antsy anxiety with this change in purpose and direction. I need to figure out the new path so that I can keep a forward movement toward new purpose. Trust. . . .

It has to turn out better than the formatting of pictures in this blog!
"Forget your perfect offering. . . . "